How we can be less triggered by menopause symptoms?

Lesson for ourselves and how we suppot others in menopause

Working with my qigong teacher Daisy Lee, I have become fascinated with the concept of stable lead energy.  

To create stable lead energy in your life, you must first begin with vertical alignment.

Vertical alignment is a practice I use at the beginning of a qigong practice where it is my own or I am guiding the women in my program into a state of being centred. 

The practice involves connecting to the earth below (yin energy) to feel grounded, and to the heavens above, (yang energy) so that you feel supported by life. Gaining a sense of standing on Yin in Yang.

No matter what life throws at you, you can always return to this place of inner peace:  be the calm eye in the centre of the storm of perimenopause.

So many things can pull us off-centre, but only if we let them.  The way consciousness works best is to become the observer.  Michael Singer describes it so well in his book, The Untethered Soul. 

When we are driving we see the trees going by and they register on our conscious mind, but we don’t get “hooked.”  The trees come into our conscious awareness and then leave.  But what about when something or someone triggers us, and instead of just passing through, the situation or they get stuck in our conscious minds? 

Rather than working through our triggers from the observer's perspective, most of us deal with our emotional reactions by packaging them up and storing them in our heart centre.  This approach ties up our vital life force and can impact the energy (Qi)we have available for daily living. 

What would it be like for you, if instead of going inward, you could express your feelings and allow the emotions to move through you? 

What if you allowed someone to hold space for you to express, modelling the role of the observer so that you could learn how to integrate the practice into your processing?  Imagine how supported you would feel if the space holder simply offered you neutral compassion. 

The concept of neutral compassion is the second component in creating what Daisy Lee calls “stable lead energy.”  In my experience, most people don’t understand what neutral compassion is, hell I didn’t either and it took me years to embrace this concept. 

When someone you know is struggling, neutral compassion is one of the greatest gifts.  Many of us are inclined to offer support in the form of advice, inadvertently sending the message that the person is somehow broken and needs to be fixed. 

Brene Brown says that if we lead with sympathy, that places problems at a distance from us, which puts us in a position of superiority, and “drives separation.”  Empathy, on the other hand, requires that one internalizes the feelings of another.  When we do this for others Brene Brown asserts that this shared experience drives interpersonal connection, and I would have to agree. 

But if you are truly internalizing the feelings of another, then there may be two of you that need support, which can exacerbate the problem rather than ameliorate it.

What Daisy, is suggesting with the idea of neutral compassion is that the kindest thing you can offer the other person is the message that they have all of the resources they need inside of them.  You are there for them, but they are the expert on themselves and will get through this.  The resolution might not look like we would have typically offered up, but the empowerment that is felt when taking ownership of struggles is undeniable.

When you combine vertical alignment with neutral compassion, you create stable lead energy.  You don’t have to assert “I’m in charge here or I have all the answers” to be a leader in your own life.  You can lead by who you are being! 

Who is the lead energy in your life?  Do you allow yourself to be a victim of your menopause symptoms?  Is one of your kids, your boss, your partner or even an influencer leading the charge? 

If you want to learn more about how you can become the stable lead energy in your life, I will be running the introductory Radiant Lotus Qigong on how I can help you align with the joy of who you were meant to be!

You can learn more about Radiant Lotus Qigong and how it supports women in menopause here

I love essential oils to enhance my work with clients and my life.

Later in August, we will be moving into late summer, the Earth Element, I will be sharing different essential oils that you can incorporate into your life to help lift your spirit, improve your energy, support menopause symptoms and facilitate a grounded sense of well-being.

The key Yin organ of the Earth Element is the Spleen. In Chinese Medicine, the functions of the Spleen are adaption, nourishment and support (the skills through which are needs are met).

These are my go-to oils for the Earth Element!

• Vetiver: The Oil of Tranquility—earthy, woody, citrusy and refreshing

• Geranium: The Hormone Balancer- fresh, floral, sweet and fruity

I will be delving much deeper into the Earth Element and the Spleen as we approach this late summer time and how we can support ourselves physically, mentally and emotionally through perimenopause and menopause.

Have questions? Just reach out and I can help.

11th of July was Internationnal Essential Oils Day. Do check out my blog on Healthieyoo about aroma point therapy and menopause.

Whats been on my radar this week…

Daniel Lieberman, someone whose book I loved on The Diary of a CEO podcast and was mythbusting a whole host of health related topics . Check it out "10,000 Steps A Day" Is A LIE! Revealing The 7 BIG LIES About Exercise, Sleep, Running, Cancer & Sugar!!!

Tune into my wonderful conversation with Teri Leigh wisdom weaver, mind shifter, stress whisperer, and monkey mind shusher. We talk about becoming a Crone, her African Elder initiation and reframing menopause. Tune in here

That is all. I am still deep in my journey with Cathy Skipper on the Alchemy of Menopause which has been emotionally quite tough at times but revealing just how much we are the bearers of past trauma, the shame and the suppression of women. This is not legacy I am willing to continue with. I will share more in August when this competes. Right now I am still processing and feeling a little raw.

Clarissa x